Completely Made-up Omens Which Will Probably Come True
Send E. Jean's
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Today's Horrorscope Wednesday March 10th |
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Forget the lessons you learned in the past!!! Think critically.
Aries
[March 21 - April 19]
Don't neglect your friends.
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Taurus
[April 20 - May 20]
Don't blame yourself. Blame the system!
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Gemini
[May 21 - June 20]
Keep trying! ...Even if you fail the first 100 times!
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Cancer
[June 21 - July 22]
Do you want to make some money? Write a child's book.
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Leo
[July 23 - August 22]
Choose art over science!
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Virgo
[August 23 - September 23]
Sometimes you just cannot win. I am sorry. But the time may come where you have to face the facts.
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Libra
[September 24 - October 22]
Sometimes...you just gotta lie.
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Scorpio
[October 23 - November 22]
You only live ONCE.....Well...maybe twice.
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Sagittarius
[November 23 - December 24]
Take advantage of those more fortunate than you!
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Capricorn
[December 25 - January 19]
Try to be on top of things this week! Don't slip!
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Aquarius
[January 20 - February 18]
You are about to make the impossible possible.
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Pisces
[February 19 - March 20]
Plan ahead this week! You'll regret it by Friday if you don't...
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The Dope Blogoscope:
A Quack Recommends the Best and Worst of the Blogosphere
The Good
Katy Perry's innocent twin sister Zooey Deschanel just released this awesome music video (they're not actually twin sisters, by the way).
This video is the innocent twin sister of "Hit Me Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears.
-Keith Hunt March 9, 2010
The Bad
British pop sensation Robbie Williams has just gotten himself into trouble with a drug-awareness charity for admitting his love of marijuana.
Chill out, Charity Group. Even if you are anti-drug, that doesn't mean you can't enjoy music by stoner musicians. I don't do LSD, but "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds" by The Beatles is my anthem.
-Keith Hunt March 9, 2010
The Terrible
Hilary Duff is reportedly writing a book. If you don't write your own songs, Hilary, I'm not sure how you're going to write your own book.
The only song I ever liked by you was "Beat Of My Heart" which that one Madden dude you were dating wrote for you. Maybe he should ghostwrite your book too.
-Keith Hunt March 9, 2010
